Katie No Pants

(via stayclassyetsassy)

animalstalkinginallcaps:

WHAT AM I DOING IN HERE, TENNISON? QUITE SIMPLE, REALLY. I OWN THIS DRAWER, LIKE I OWN THIS COMPANY, AND I WILL OCCUPY WHATEVER PORTION OF THE COMPANY I FEEL LIKE, WHENEVER I FEEL LIKE, AND UNLESS YOU CAN FIND ‘EXPLAINING MY ACTIONS TO SLACKJAWED, BUNGLING ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES’ SOMEWHERE ON MY C.V. I SUGGEST YOU SIT DOWN AT THAT DESK I GRACIOUSLY ALLOW YOU TO HAVE AND STOP WASTING MY TIME WITH YOUR BABBLE. IF I WANTED TO BE DISAPPOINTED BY YOUR SEMI-COHERENT RAMBLING I’D CALL A SALES MEETING.

NOW WHERE ARE THOSE REPORTS I ASKED FOR? 

STOP LOOKING AROUND, YOU TIT. I’M SITTING ON THEM. HOW DID YOU GET THIS JOB? AM I YOUR FATHER? DO YOU HAVE BLACKMAIL PHOTOS OF ME? CAN YOU EVEN READ, TENNISON?

I’M GOING TO GO DOWN TO 14 AND SLEEP IN THE 11”X17” PAPER TRAY IN THE COPY ROOM. I’LL BE BACK AT 3 AND I EXPECT YOU’LL HAVE THE SECOND QUARTER PROJECTIONS COMPLETED AND FAXED OVER TO MARTY.

_{[preorder the book]}

(via knabenhaft)

(via somewheresomeoneissmiling)

(via mutethepanda)

(via wunder-leben)

(via wiz-kitty)

(via pantsareunwelcome)

(via berrydelightful)

kittens-cupcakes-bows:

fortheluvofdoms:

dominantlife:

thedrunkenmoogle:

Squirtle, Wartortle, Blastoise (Pokemon Shot and Cocktails)

Ingredients: 
Squirtle-
1/3 shot spiced rum
1/3 shot coconut rum
1/3 shot blue curacao

Wartortle-
1/2 shot spiced rum
1/2 shot coconut rum
1/2 shot blue curacao
Fill with Mountain Dew Voltage

Blastoise-
1 Squirtle
1 Wartortle
1 shot light rum
Fill with Mountain Dew Voltage 

Directions: For the Squirtle shot, simply pour all three ingredients into a shot glass.  For the Wartortle cocktail, shake the alcoholic ingredients, pour over crushed ice in a lowball glass, then fill with Mountain Dew Voltage.  For the Blastoise cocktail, pour one Squirtle and one Wartortle into a highball glass over ice, add the light rum, then fill with the Mountain Dew.  

Check out our other Bulbasaur, Ivysaur, and Venusaur cocktails, as well as our Charmander, Charmeleon and Charizard cocktails.

(Drink created and photographed by The Drunken Moogle.)